Wednesday, February 13, 2008

The Automatic 2nd Date

Wonderful and loving people feel left out of the relationship world. Some people even wonder if there's any hope to find that special person. And what is tomorrow? Valentine's Day. The day that causes more heartache than most want to admit.

So how do you get the chance to develop closer, more intimate relationships?

First tip: It doesn't happen because someone is more blessed! And friends, just because you are married, you are still supposed to be dating. So what if you used some of the techniques in this book to raise the bar on your intimacy? What if you flirt with your wife or hubby? Hmmm...endless uses for this info...Read on...

Take a look at these tips from Victoria about dating and deepening those opportunities...

Meet Victorya :-D

F.A.I.T.H…. following, always intently trusting Him…wow isn’t that hard to do consistently when you’re single and searching for the man of your dreams? I mean I’ve been there done that during my decades of singlehood. But I held out for God’s best and it paid off. My husband and I just had our 10 year wedding anniversary and he is still everything I dreamed of! So how did I get such an incredible catch? And how can you? By trusting God, knowing what you want and working on your dating skills! My 2nd dating book, THE AUTOMATIC 2ND date, was just released written specifically for you ladies who are frustrated with a lack of men, first dates, and the ever important follow-up 2nd date!
Victorya Michaels Rogers, Dating Coach, Author The Automatic 2nd Date

Angie: AUTOMATIC 2nd DATE offers a unique dating approach. Why focus so much on getting a 2nd date?

VICTORYA: If you can’t get past the first date, you won’t be booking a honeymoon anytime soon. The sad thing is Christian ladies who would really be great catches are just blowing it and scaring their dates away by making silly, careless mistakes on their first dates—like talking too much, obsessing on exes, talking about marriage, calling the guy before or after the first date, etc. If they just tweak a few of their dating behaviors, they will transform their dating life without changing who they are! If these secrets become a habit, you can stop stressing about first dates and focus on your man and deciding if HE is the great catch and worth your time. When you do that, 2nd dates become automatic.

Angie: In your book you list many unique places to meet men. Tell us a few.

VICTORYA: I advise skipping bars and clubs and just plunging yourself into the social world around you—be it at your church, country club, charity, or a special-interest group at your community center. As you interact with more and more people, you will automatically find yourself around — and introduced to — available men.

Angie: You say the three-second flirt is a great way to get noticed. How does it work?

VICTORYA: Yes, get that cute guy’s attention by FLIRTing with him! I have a lot of dating tips in The Automatic 2nd Date. One of them is to make sure you catch his eye. Eye contact is huge! Next time you’re in a “target rich environment of potential dates, slowly scan the room with calm, soft eyes, resting your eyes briefly on any man who captures your attention, and then casually glance for a bare ring finger. If the finger is bare, lock into a gaze for your three-second flirt... Add a slight smile or grin, and then casually look away. You can repeat it several times to get your point across if you’d like. Just any longer than 5 second glance at a time borders creepy.

Angie: So he notices you, and you’re on your first date. I see you recommend asking lots of questions. You even give us 100 potential questions. But how do we avoid turning it into an interview or worse, an interrogation?

VICTORYA: Believe it or not, it’s quite easy to carry on a sincere conversation by asking questions. To keep your evening from sounding like an interrogation make sure you are really listening to his answers to your questions and go from there. You’re guiding the conversation, not dictating it. If you genuinely stay tuned in and listen to him, then the questions that come to your mind will help the conversation flow naturally and you will draw him to you. One of the easiest ways to get a 2nd date is to be genuinely interested in what your date has to say! Everyone wants to be heard. When you listen he will feel understood and he will want to see you again. So offer your undivided attention, look him in the eye, ask relevant questions, and be sure to laugh at his jokes!

Angie: There is so much to cover on this topic. Do you have a website or blog with more of these tips for our audience to check out?

VICTORYA: Yes, my website has a lot of additional tips and advice for single women! Check it out-- it’s You can also order my books and learn about my coaching program. I hope I have helped you begin to see that dating does NOT have to be overwhelming, scary and stressful. In fact, believe it or not, you can actually enjoy the process if you take the time to find out what you REALLY want in a man, sharpen your dating skills and take risks. There is so much information I’d love to impart to you to make dating less anxiety filled, so feel free to visit my site anytime and/or check out my books Finding a Man Worth Keeping and The Automatic 2nd Date.
Victorya Michaels Rogers, Dating Coach, Author The Automatic 2nd Date

Angie: And please visit me over at God Uses Broken Vessels for an even more in depth look at dating and relationships. (See the Feb 11th post.)

1 comment:

  1. What a fun interview! Thanks for visiting our blog today, Victorya! I'll have to practice a flirty glance on my husband. :)