Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Lighten the Load: Angry Birds Meet the Little Pigs

Angie here:
I decided we needed a little lightning of the load today. Humor is an awesome skill to use to cope with disaster and difficulty, see Gems of Wisdom. Beyond the hurricane, the fires, the floods...a little letting off of the steam. Angry Birds will show up. I promise ;-)

So here's a step in that direction. Yep, my foot. Nope, not just any pic of my foot. The foot that terrified the cat (see background). Remember that verse in the Bible that the demons all ask Jesus if they can leap into the hogs? Doesn't it look like evil demon cat back there? Lol. Actually she's very sweet. But who wouldn't be scared looking at that swollen Bigfoot? Like I could have made the tracks for the legendary beast!!
Bigfoot discovered

Necessary background: So I hobbled all over the country for the last 5 weeks. We all thought it was a stress fracture. I wore a boot and everything. But today my new podiatrist, Dr. Mangold (love this doc), figured out it wasn't a broken foot at all. It's a neuroma. (That's a pinched nerve in the knuckle of my toes that can take weeks to months to heal.) He actually used a tuning fork to see if my bones vibrating caused pain. It didn't. So it wasn't broken.

So what's funny about that you ask? Simple. My husband's reaction!
Dr. Mangold told me this injury only happens to athletes. I preened ;) My doc just called me an athlete.

That little tidbit sent my husband into fits of laughter. Uh huh.
I'm not the "normal" athlete. In fact, he knows I work out on treadmills, elipticals, yoga, and some weights. I usually work out 1-1/2 hours. But he doesn't consider it athlete level when he's a champion wrestler, football, and soccer player. I see his point. BUT...

Hah! I have the proof. The doc says so :D

Thank you, Doc M., for understanding my need to work out. He had a secret smile when I panicked about having to wait weeks or months more after already a full month away from my workouts. He knew I was going to choose the road lesser traveled. According to him all athletes do. See? There it is again, I'm an athlete. 

It wasn't a pleasant one, that road less traveled. Uh uh! But his expression to my reaction was priceless. He knew there was no other way with me. And he patiently waited as I verbally pumped myself up for a shot on the top of my foot into the bottom of my foot. EW! OW, OW, OW!!

So the abreviated conversation went something like this:
"I'm going to give you a shot in your foot. It's cortisone. Do you have any reaction to cortisone? People who do will see immediate redness and swelling."
Me: "I don't think so. Is it going to hurt? It doesn't matter, I'm going to do it anyway because I can't not exercise. You know I've gained 5 lbs. not exercising this month. I have to do it. Yes, I want the shot."
Doc M: "I know." I'm sure he's thinking I've already told him 3 times. I give him huge kudos for not busting out laughing at everything I said. "It won't be too bad."
Me: "It doesn't matter. I'll breathe deep. I can do that." In. Out. In. I falter as I see the needle and slowly let my breath out.

Shot being given: I-N! I am going to do this. O-U-T.  I-N! Holy cow, what was I thinking? Angie is now wheezing deeply. "Um, Doc, it's really, um, well..." Wheezing deeper and grabbing squishy cushion of table/chair.
Doc M: "Are you okay? I have to cover the nerve."
Me: "Whew, that's something. That's really filling up my--" W-h-e-e-e-z. "Whoa baby, it's..." Sucking intense air. Room is now devoid of oxygen. "My whole foot is--Whoa, that's sure--taking--a--long--time." Chair cushion may soon be ripped off.

Hours later...(okay, it was maybe 3 minutes but it felt like hours!)
Doc M: "It seems to take a long time, but we're done now." He's holding the needle visibly away from my foot. I still don't believe him. Nope. I don't. The nerve is still reacting as if the needle is having a party in my bigfoot.
Me: "Oh, it still feels like you're in there!" Now the oxygen from the hallway and down into the nurses station is depleted.
Doc M: "It should feel better soon." We both observe the huge ball now jutting out of the bottom of my foot and turning white while the top turns red and swollen, kind of like one of those people that has a sensitivity to, oh pooh, I'm one of those.

Me: "Check that out. This is so going on facebook!"
Doc M: Okay, he didn't say anything here, but I could see he was trying not to die laughing! He actually had to turn away from me. Do you think he told his wife this story later? I bet she's dying laughing now too :) His POV must have been quite interesting. Hmm, maybe he could be a character in The Memory Quilt! YES! He deserves that honor, but he'll have to be a heart surgeon for that story.

And by the way, I downloaded Angry Birds and played it while waiting for my fav foot doc. It made me giggle and put me in a positive mood. Using funny games could be considered a healthy coping skill.

I can easily say that I feel like my little piggies have been destroyed by Angry Birds... ;-) But I should be feeling better in a few days rather than a few months and my little piggies can go to market again. Today though, we ran wee, wee, wee all the way home!

Psst: I had BLTs for dinner and just now realized the irony in that!


4 comments:

  1. Ang,
    I dislike needles and was squirming reading your post. Yikes!!
    I hope it is well soon, though. I know being out of your routine isn't fun!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I totally understand that shot pain! I've had three surgeries on ingrown toenails. They make injections all around the toe until it's huge. NOT fun. I actually almost passed out one of the times. LOL Had to get ice packs on my neck and lie down. :)

    I'm glad you got a diagnosis! I hope the shot works.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I have to admit I was going for the humor not the squeamish. Sorry ladies :-) Now my family would have been in there elbowing the doc out of the way so they could see it. Something about a house full of men... but even the girls think that stuff is too cool. Go figure. I can do medical emergency on other people but get stressed when it's my children. I have triaged an auto accident on a mountain, assisted during a co-worker's heart attack, and taken care of my mother in her last hours. But my kids get hurt and I freak out. I might be better now I'm older. Hmm, I wonder.
    Angie

    ReplyDelete
  4. Angie, I have a squeamish husband and gave birth to three children just like him. NONE of them will ever follow their grandfather, grandmother or me into healthcare fields. They would pass right out. :)

    ReplyDelete